Morning Conversations
by Sparkline
Summary: Hermione has a date, which leads to a rather embarrassing conversation. Sirius is caught ogling Hermione's bum. Of course, Harry is outraged. Mild swearing, nothing sirius (see what I did there?) ONESHOT


Disclaimer: Characters belong to J.K. Rowling. Hence, I am on a fanfiction site.

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Hermione bounced into the kitchen that morning, obviously happy about something. She had dressed up, too: tight jeans and a light pink button up top. She hummed as she made her way around the kitchen; milk from the fridge, cereal from the pantry. . .

"What are you so happy about?" Harry asked with an amused expression as he continued to scoop cereal into his mouth. Sirius briefly glanced up from his paper to note Hermione's apparent change of mood. "Yes Hermione, aren't you supposed to be the _serious_ one?"

She rolled her eyes, "Honestly, you two, give it a rest. Can't a girl be happy?"

"Well it depends on what the said girl is happy about. . ." teased Sirius.

God, he knew, didn't he? He knew that she had a date this evening. She'd tried so hard to keep it a secret! She spun her body around to look through the window, so they wouldn't be able to see her blush. They'd mock her to death about this! They _always _mocked her on the topic of relationships.

Meanwhile, Harry looked back and forth between the two. What was going on? "What are you two on about? Sirius, what's Hermione so happy about?"

"It's nothing, Harry," Hermione said, waving her hand in a "nevermind" fashion.

"Nothing my arse, this is a huge change for you."

If possible, Hermione blushed even harder. "Mind you Sirius, this is _not _a _huge _change for me. I'll have you know, I have a very healthy amount of interaction with others of the opposite gender."

Sirius snorted, "Harry, Ron and I don't count, love."

_Interactions with the opposite gender?_ "Blimey, Hermione, you've got a date!" Harry exclaimed as if he'd just realized something vital. "Come on, tell us, who is it with?" he prompted her.

Well, it couldn't hurt that badly. . . "Jonathan. Jonathan Byrd," Hermione said. "You know, the bloke from work."

Harry thought hard. . . "Don't tell me you mean, _that _Jonathan, Hermione! Please tell me it's not him."

"Why?! What's wrong with him? He's a perfectly good person," Hermione tried to desperately reason with him. She didn't have to justify who she dated to him.

Harry actually scoffed, "Please Hermione, he's like. . .Percy, but worse. You can do a lot better."

Hermione was actually quite angry now, "How dare you! You miserable litte- did it ever occur to you that maybe I actually _like_ him?"

Sirius was not about let his godson be attacked by a fuming Ms. Granger. "Come on, Hermione. Harry's just. . ." Why was Harry acting like this? "He's just jealous. Yeah, that's it!" Sirius responded grandly.

"I-what? No, you're crazy," Harry tried to defend himself. What the hell? Why would Sirius say that? He was supposed to be on his side!

Hermione sighed and threw her hands up in the air. "I've had it with you two. I'm going over to the Burrow to visit Ginny." And with that, the exasperated Hermione Granger angrily marched out of the kitchen.

Sirius's eyes followed her out. Harry was confused as to why Sirius would be looking wistfully after Hermione and as he followed his eyes, he found that Sirius had been staring at Hermione's bum!

"What the hell, Sirius?!" Harry gasped. "You go around telling her that I'm jealous of her date and now _you're _the one ogling her arse!" To say that Harry looked disgusted would be the understatement of the century. Sirius was so. . .so, old! Well, compared to Hermione, anyway. Harry decided to nip this new development in the bud, "No," he said forcefully. "You are not allowed to look at my best friends arse. Ever."

Sirius looked offended, "Why, I would never, Harry, you're imagining things. . ." Actually, Harry was right. He _had _been looking at her arse. And he was not sorry. Nope, not at all. Oh, and he certainly didn't plan on stopping just because Harry told him to.

"No, Sirius, I saw what I saw."

"Well, it's not like you can control what parts of Hermione I can and can't see. . ." This was the wrong thing to say. Harry looked like he was going to barf. Hermione was young enough to be his daughter!

"But Sirius, it's disturbing. She's my best friend and you're my godfather. Imagine how it must make me feel," Harry tried reasoning with him. Sirius could _not_ have those kinds of relations with _Hermione_.

Sirius gave a resigned sigh, "Oh, Harry. I won't go after her. Can't a man appreciate a nice body? Geez, the way you'd blown up. . .well, I'd think you liked Hermione in a more-than-just-friends way_._" At this point Sirius smirked.

Harry groaned and got up. He had been caught. Sirius, he should have known that he'd find out. Hopefully Sirius would be able to keep his mouth shut. . .

"Yes, Harry, I know all about your little crush." Sirius said, nodding knowingly as he sipped his tea. He'd actually known for a while. Who hadn't, though?

Harry cleared his throat and had the audacity to look embarrassed. "Maybe, um, well, maybe you could keep from telling Hermione?" he asked uncertainly.

Sirius snorted, "Please, as if. After you blew up on me like that. . .Sorry, Harry, but now I _have_ to tell her." He almost looked remorseful.

Well, at least the look on Harry's face was priceless.

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Author's Note:

It's my first one! I'm actually quite proud of it. Tell me what you think.


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